This is a pretty typical conversation in my house. Like every day. Smaller child, watching me hand older child a second piece of toast: “More toast please!” Me: “After you finish your eggs.” Him, 20 seconds later: “Finished!” Me: “You...
Read MoreI’m sorry-not-sorry my kid is too busy for you
My boy is ALL BOY. He has no patience to sit and be still. He is into everything. So please do not judge my parenting style. What I need from you is grace.
Read MoreWhy momma turns into the big bad, wicked witch of the west
“Look at my drawing of our family!” There was a PAUSE. Followed by my friend’s puzzled response: “Where’s the mommy?” “Oh,” her daughter replied, “She died.” #thanksDisney But don’t worry, Disney always offers up a female role model. She’s just...
Read MoreChick-fil-A, it’s time to start recycling
Chick-fil-A isn’t exactly progressive. Their cows probably think anti-gay is a charming relative: Wee luv Antee Gay! So I shouldn’t be surprised they’re anti-recycling, too. I just can’t bring myself to boycott them. Because, ladies, they do make a damn,...
Read MoreThe 6 biggest myths about ADOPTION
What adoption myths do you hold? Here's the truth about opening your home and heart.
Read MoreThe 10 penis rules for boys
It’s a bit unnerving to arrive at daycare to pick up your children just as one of them emerges from the bathroom sans pants and undies, completely delighted, pointing and announcing, “I showed her my penis. And her my penis....
Read MoreUse your words, my darling rage-child
My child is destined to be a sociopath. How often does that cross your mind? Never? I don’t believe you. How about when the bear lovie turns into a projectile aimed at #RockStarDad’s crotch? Or when the dog is pummeled...
Read MoreHow to manipulate your kid to do the right thing
If I actually knew how to manipulate your kid to do the right thing, I’d write a book. You’d buy it. I’d make a million dollars and retire from life. In the meantime, daycare gave me a reading assignment. For...
Read MorePlease don’t feed my kids crap at school
Oh, you know, kids can eat crap at school and totally succeed (um, nope!) So there’s no need to freak out about this awesome new bill the House of Representatives just introduced, benignly entitled, House Bill 610. Otherwise known as...
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